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Teach Your Child Positive Self Talk Early

A great tool you can give your child is to teach them the ability to have positive self talk with themselves. Especially when they take on what they feel is a challenging task. One of the first things my students say when I give them something to do that they don’t think they can do is “I can’t do it”. When they say that I pull them away from the task look them in their eyes and explain to them that they will be able to do it.

I ask them if they would like help, sometimes it’s yes and sometimes no. I think just knowing that they will have support and help if they need it gives them courage to try. We then go back over to the task and before they attempt the task I ask them to say ” I can do it!”. At first they are very timid and I ask them to say it again. I ask them to say it progressively louder until they are yelling it out with emotion and enthusiasm and then I ask them to perform the task.

Usually they perform the task with ease. Sometimes I stand near by for support and help if needed. But for the most part they perform the task independent of my help.

You should see their faces after they’ve done it. They are so happy and proud. I am happy and proud too because they feel good about themselves and I know I have accomplished two things. I know that the next time they approach this same task they will perform it with confidence. I have developed trust between me and the child and helped them to develop confidence in themselves.

Help your child to learn to coach themselves and to say positive and encouraging words to themselves.  You can assure them that you have faith in them and that you think they can do it. Also explain that you understand how they feel and that maybe they can just give it a try. Be patient and compassionate with them and sometimes you may have to break the task down even more so that they can experience success first and build confidence for later.

Doing this helps children to build confidence and esteem and the willingness to try new things. It also builds independence within the child. It is especially effective in the classroom with preschoolers. Once they see someone successfully perform a task it gives them the incentive and courage to try.

Let me know what you think and try it out. I’d love to hear from you.

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